The Elder Scrolls VI: Oblivion

By Dave Kozicki

Living in Oblivion…and loving it!

Welcome friend. Come closer and let this humble soul spin you a tale. A magnificent, wondrous tale of bravery against terrifying evil, of redemption in a land filled with despair, of a messenger surely sent by the Nine Gods as a beacon of hope and courage to those who cannot see the light. Listen as we recount the legend of a warrior without peer, or fear, who wrenched open the very Gates of Hell, laughed in the face of its Dark Prince and shoved an almighty sword down its throat. Welcome, dear friend, to The Elder Scrolls VI. Welcome to Oblivion.

YOU’RE SOOO GOOD LOOKING…

From the moment you boot this bad boy up, you know you’re in-store for something special. As you are customising your character, getting the look just right, the wealth of options is impressive. You can adjust anything, be it hair length, skin colour, eye pigmentation…whatever. Then the real fun begins. You get to pick your race. Each one has unique characteristics, and it’s a really tough decision. Some lizard inspired creatures can breathe underwater and are impervious to poison and disease, cat-like beasts can see in the dark, others can summon ancestral guardians to protect them like the Dark Elves (our favourite due to their balanced mastery of sword, the bow and destruction magic, and the 75% resistance to fire don’t hurt either). Pimp out your hero and away you go.

ERR…WHO? WHAT? WHERE? WHEN?

So here you are, stuck in a prison cell thinking, I knew those promiscuous maidens weren’t over eighteen. You swivel the old thumb sticks around to get a better look and the first thing running through your head is “Jesus H Christ this has some slick visuals!” Light flickers off the walls, and you can almost touch the moisture glistening. It is really quite remarkable. Those of you who don’t dig first person can click R3 and shazam! It switches to third person so you can play it both ways. It’s handled in such an understated way that you’ll almost not even notice…that’s the brilliance of Oblivion…and a theme carried throughout almost every aspect of it.

ENGAGE!

Something drags your peepers away from your lush environment, namely some heavily armed guards protecting a regal figure. He opens a hidden passageway and beckons you to join him. You may miss a little of what he’s saying as Patrick Stewart’s subtle tones convey an overwhelming sense of Shakespearian drama, you really feel like you’re off to save the world. After taking a few twists and turns, you go off and explore the caverns on your own. Cue tutorial stage. Grab yourself a nice rusty sword and start looking for something to fricassee. You spot an inattentive goblin that looks like the perfect scabbard. You sneak up on him, use him as a sheath and gleefully enjoy your first (of many) stealth kill. Clicking L3 pops you into “sneak” mode. An eye surrounds your crosshair, if it remains dim, you’re in the clear, if the edge lights up, you’re toast. Sneaking deals critical hits and up to six times the damage, so it’s a useful skill to develop.

MY HORRORSCOPE SAID NOTHING ABOUT THIS

By the time you rejoin your king, you’d have slayed a dozen or so goblins, discovered rudimentary lock picking, your bow and arrow, got a handle on the menu, learnt how to block and parry, tried out a few spells and given alchemy a whirl…whew!! As you regroup, one of the elite guards helps determine which constellation you were born under. They way you’ve played up till this point governs which birth sign you’re assigned, however, you can choose if you’d prefer. Most of these give you a once-a-day skill, like full heal or something along those lines. Before you get comfortable, the king is murdered by some crazy cultists known as the Mythic Dawn (who pledge allegiance to Mehrunes Dagon…see below).

THE STAGE IS SET

In his final moments the king charges you with a quest. He gives you the Amulet of Kings to deliver to his last surviving heir. Only a member of the Septim (royal) family can use said amulet to light the Dragonfires at The Temple of the One, thus keeping the mystical barriers in place, and shutting down the Oblivion Gates, which the dastardly Mehrunes Dagon (Dark Prince of Oblivion) is using to launch his assault on Cyrodill. Got all that?

You navigate through the sewers and reach a gate to the outside world. As with your birth sign, your class will also be suggested, though this too may be altered. Choose this carefully as it will govern which skills are your bread and butter, and utilising these is the only way to level up. You can also change any other aspect of your character, but after you go through the gate, that’s all she wrote.

SIZE DOES MATTER

To say that Cyrodill is a ridiculously large playpen, would be like saying Donald Trump’s got a coupla bucks, or Jessica Alba is sorta hot…you with us? There are around two hundred or so caverns, mines, shrines and gates to explore. Here are just a few highlights. You can instantly teleport between areas you’ve already visited through the menu. Many NPCs’ disposition to you changes if you have a weapon drawn. Some will have information for you, but need to be “convinced” with bribes or persuaded by your mastery of Speechcraft. You can pick up most food items, or even wild flowers and plants, grab your mortar and pestle, and get your Alchemy on to create potions or poisons to enhance the killing-ness of your weapons. You can break into houses or pickpocket most people, and sell stolen items on the black market. HOWEVER, the town guards are tough mofos and do not look lightly upon these transgressions, and you’ll probably end up in jail (resisting arrest is not recommended as it’s usually a one way ticket to your last saved game).

Alternately, the Thieves’ Guild could approach you, and then it’s off to Cyrodill’s seedy underbelly. You could murder someone for the fun of it, and be recruited into the Dark Brotherhood, as an assassin for hire. Perhaps you’re partial to phone throwing Kiwi’s and fancy trying your hand at the Gladiator’s Arena as a betting spectator, or Maximus hisself. Maybe you’re a goody little two shoes. Join the Fighters’ Guild and defend the weak, or take a walk in Gandalf’s shoes and locate artefacts for the Mage’s Guild. You could even get bitten by a vampire, and live out your days feasting on blood and avoiding sunlight. As you can see…the possibilities are almost endless…and most of what we’ve just described isn’t even part of the main storyline!

FROM HELL’S HEART, I STAB AT THEE!!!!

Your first foray into the Plane of Oblivion is the besieged town of Kvatch. You’ll need to close the gate, and save the town. Stepping through the portal is literally a welcome to Hell. Huge, horn-riddled towers, blood red skies and molten pools of magma greet you. All that’s missing is Celine Dion playing in the background! There are tons of little scamps and imps running around hurling fireballs at you (any cold spell works really well against these), as well as some Battlemages, so stay on your toes. (Hint: each gate is kept open by a sacred stone. These can be taken to seal the gate and upgrade magical armour and weapons) Once you’ve rescued Kvatch, there’s only fifteen more to go! Plus the Great Gate at the conclusion.

DON’T I KNOW YOU?

The longer you spend on your quest, the more celebrity and notoriety you’ll receive. NPCs might greet you as “The Hero of Kvatch” or “Champion of the Arena”, whilst thieves recognise you as a master pickpocket. Other shady individuals may praise your skill as an assassin. The best part is you can wear several hats at once, with each faction only recognising you as a member of theirs solely. We were cracking up at the fact that we were part of the Blades, a secret brotherhood that defends the empire from evil, and at the same time, a member of the Dark Brotherhood, a surreptitious guild that deals death if the price is right.

I THINK YOU UNDERESTIMATE THE SNEAKINESS SIR

Check out this little scenario. In the closing stages, before the final epic (and it really is EPIC) battle, we’d realised we were nigh invisible to the naked eye. We’d earned a Master’s rank in sneak, and had a ring of chameleon and could literally run down the street in broad daylight, with NPCs none the wiser. It gets better. We jumped to a deserted mine and opened up a serious can of whoop ass on some zombies, vampires and goblins. We were, straight up, laughing out loud as we snuck up behind one after another, dealing them a world of hurt whilst they were wondering what the hell was going on, and where the next one was coming from. What? All’s fair in love and war. Nuthin’ better than getting the drop on someone and repeatedly stabbing them in the back…is there? Maybe punctuate it with a “Bitch! You don’t know who the hell I am!” , that’s just how we roll.

SO IT’S PRETTY GOOD, AYE?

What we’ve given you here is but a mere sample of what’s available. The Elder Scrolls VI: Oblivion offers you a chance to live out your heroic fantasies or murderous tendencies or…both. The choice is yours, and it’s not where your journey ends…but the path you take to get there that makes it all the more exhilarating. Again, and again, and again. Enjoy!!